With Valentine’s Day quickly approaching, there are pink and red decorations, his and her gift suggestions, and so much love in the air it’s hard not to get caught up in the hype of it all!
Since my husband and I remarried, we have kind of slacked on the whole celebrating holidays and birthdays and just went all out for each other at Christmas. We are currently working hard to save up money for a house and our love has been on such a high since we recommitted ourselves, I didn’t really see the need for him to buy all this material stuff for me. I am still just so grateful to have us back to how we were always meant to be.
However, with Valentine’s day coming up, we had a talk about whether or not we were going to do anything together and while we spoke about 100 things we could do. I selfishly wanted to make it a self-care day for myself! ha!
While we were separated, I spent many holidays learning how to make myself feel amazing and Valentine’s day was one of those days I chose to love on me and my children a little harder than other days to help me not feel bad about my situation during that time in my life.
My husband (x then) from my point of view at that time, had moved on and had someone to spend it with while I didn’t.
Rather than get upset I went overboard loving on myself. I got a hotel room with a jacuzzi, some good books, my bible, and ordered some extra delicious food and spent the evening enjoying myself. I went shopping and splurged on myself and lit candles to help myself relax.
Let me tell you I never felt so in love with myself in my life! I left that room feeling amazing and truly loving me.
Now that we are back together, I still feel like Valentine’s day is “my day” . the other 364 days in the year I’m spending them loving on others and squeezing in time to love on me when I can, but that Valentine’s day was a changing point in my life.
I still hold that belief that I really don’t need him or anyone to make me feel how I have learned to make myself feel. I feel great and I treat myself great! Don’t get me wrong, I love surprises and genuine acts of affection, however, I don’t crave that validation like I used to. I used to feel like he had to get me something or he didn’t care which I now feel is very childish and self-centered.
Now I also could truly care less. Getting me something or not I’m going to treat me! What others do for me no longer holds such a high detrimental value like it did before.
I want a date night with myself. A day to enjoy everything that is me and pamper myself. I want to take myself somewhere cozy and wrap up with my mind and my thoughts and explore what’s been stewing away behind what I talk about or even realize. I would prefer to leave my phone, but if I can’t, I’ll take emergency calls only between 4 and 6 pm (haha just kidding !!…or not.hehe)
My advice for anyone who may be spending the holidays alone or even if you do have someone significant whether it is Valentine’s day or not. Pick a day to date yourself. I mean really, date yourself. The restaurant, the hotel room, the massage, the whole works! Go to the store and browse the Valentine’s day section, see anything you like? Buy it ! Go all out for you just once with no regrets and no reservations!
On a day that’s meant for couples, I found the most important to love I could ever find..